Sunday, June 8, 2014

Average Burgers and Above Average Zombie Programming at Hilt

Every bar in this city thinks it has "The Best Happy Hour Burger" or "Portland's Best Late Night Burger" or some other unregulated nonsense. I assure you, I am here to weed through the free wheeling claims of burger superiority to give it to you straight up. They wont all be winners, and they wont all be losers. Most, like Hilt, will fall squarely in the middle of the road. And there's no shame in that.  The mediocre is necessary. Without regular, boring stuff there's nothing to put spectacular stuff in context. If everything is fabulous then nothing is fabulous- you feel me? Hilt may claim to have some kind of impressive burger situation, but it's really just a regular old bar burger, and there's nothing wrong with that. Yeah, I would eat it again, but I wouldn't brag about it.

Burger: Aside from the heavy handed schmear of mayo, very average. I've noted before that I will typically review a kitchen's basic burger before I review any tricked out chef creation style burgers. My logic is that if a basic burger cant be made compellingly why should I or anyone else give some fancy dagwood-esque burger the time of day? There are some impressive looking burgers on the menu at Hilt, and if their basic burger is any indication, they probably wont suck. The basic burger boasted a fluffy sesame seed bun, fresh butter lettuce and ripe red tomato slices and a luscious, if skimpy, patty. Also, sorry about that picture, it was dark and everyone in the bar was really getting into The Walking Dead so I felt like an asshole blasting my flash.

Fries: Our party did a lot of plate sharing and one of the favorite's was the kasseri fries. These were hand cut and covered in kasseri cheese with some type of lemon pepper situation. Good for sharing, great for choking on when a Walking Dead scene scares the crap out of you.

Service: Very fast and friendly. I think that Portland is shaking off the whole uppity server reputation in favor of personable, more laid back service. I like that much better and Hilt's got it.

Where: 1934 NE Alberta Street

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